Making Egypt Great Again

It was fortunate for Moses that – courtesy of his rigorous counter-insurgency training in the Egyptian Army – he was able to “live off the land” while plodding through the aridity of what is today the Sinai Peninsula, to reach sanctuary in the Land of Midian. For food, Moses ate the snakes and lizards he caught. For potable water, he squeezed out cacti, and drank from the occasional well he happened upon.

Moses was therefore in quite good nick when he’d crossed into the Land of Midian. He did, though, look gaunt and haggard – due in no small part to his heartbreak at probably never seeing Hatshepsut again. Moses understood that although she had become Egypt’s de facto Pharaoh, she had courtiers – powerful ones – who had resented Moses unique status in the Royal household. Consequently they were always conjuring up plans to kill him. Hatshepsut was therefore risking overthrow through a Palace coup should she try to get Moses back.

There had also been the balefully growing influence in the Royal circles of Hatshepsut’s co-ruler, the boy Thutmose lll (Baby Thut), who had been only a little baby when his father, Thutmose ll (Thut junior), had died. Just before he breathed his last, Thut junior had decreed that his wife Hatshepsut, although not Baby Thut’s mother, would rule Egypt as Regent for the infant boy. Unfortunately Baby Thut wasn’t an infant for long. He soon grew to become  a truculent slack-jawed teenager who couldn’t wait to become the sole Pharaoh. He had always hated Hatshepsut, who he regarded as a nosey parker, and bossy.

Baby Tut’s assessment of Hatshepsut wasn’t far off the mark, because she always was ambitious, both for herself and for Egypt. Even while growing up she had considered herself the equal of any man. She therefore saw no reason why she shouldn’t become Pharaoh when her father, Thutmose l, died.

***

From when she and Moses first became lovers, Hatshepsut would from time to time confide to him what she wanted for Egypt and Egyptians.

Moses still remembered that night he and Hatshepsut were lying post-coitally together, their arms and legs entwined, and she had said, “Dearest Moses, with you at my side I want to make Egypt great again. By this, I mean making Egypt a beacon of hope – a shining city on a hill, if you will – for all our neighbours, whether Hebrew, Canaanite, Aramean, Assyrian, Midianite, Nubian, or what have you. I can only do this by becoming Pharaoh when Daddy dies.”

“This is a considerable undertaking” said Moses. “If anyone can do it you can, sweet Hatshepsut”.

“I want us to come to them as friends, not as conquerors” said Hatshepsut, “I want all our neighbours to love us Egyptians, not hate us, as so many now do because they see us only as foes, and for good reason. Daddy has been the cause of this because of his inferiority complex born of having no sense of inner worth. He is so empty inside, he can only assuage it by having Egypt conquer other peoples. This only makes us more enemies, and  weakens us. Having more and more enemies to put down, also uses up  our precious state resources better used to help ordinary Egyptians have more fulfilling and happier lives. I mean, what’s the point of Egypt being the mightiest power in our region, if most of our people are unhappy because they’re poor and oppressed, and feel there’s no way out? Unless we – their rulers – change our ways they’re one day going to come for us.”

“For a woman, you’re remarkably perspicacious” said Moses. “Yours is my view too.”

“I’m glad you think this, darling Moses. This is another sign we’re soul mates. You know, the irony is that the poorer and unhappier ordinary Egyptians become, the more they’ll feel the freedom to rise up against Daddy as the Pharaoh, or me, should I succeed him. Even though we might kill them in their thousands while they swarm through the Palace gates, they won’t be stopped because they’ve nothing left to lose. Yes, for them, freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.”

“This is brilliant” said Moses, “and it comes out of your brilliant mind. I’ve told you before, darling Hatshepsut, it’s your mind which I love. It excites me as much as your body does. I want to make love to you again, right now. ”

“Yes…….yes…….do” breathed Hatshepsut.

Sources:
– Exodus 2
Women in Scripture
Bible Archeology
The Woman Who Would Be King
The Perplexing Historical Moses

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Exodus 2 and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Making Egypt Great Again

  1. Cheri says:

    So much FUN this episode is, Christopher. From Baby Tut to the “nosey parker,” your bold paraphrase of this iconic biblical story is a riot. Not sure that is the reaction that you want.
    Your “Make Egypt Great Again” title is well, relevant, and clever.

    Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose…
    The perspicacious woman…

    If only the Muslim Brotherhood had read your version of this story, things in current day Egypt might return to its previous greatness.

    Keep this going. It is very funny and unique.

    • Christopher says:

      That you enjoyed this posting is an honour indeed. It was as much fun for me to write as it may have been for you to read.

      Stay tuned for further revelations……….

      • Cheri says:

        Good! I used to tell my students that often the best writing comes from emotion. That you are having fun shows big time. I look forward to your next “chapter.”

  2. Josh says:

    In your previous posting you said Moses on entering Midian was “……Emaciated, parched, dirty, skin bleeding from thorns, robes in tatters, mind delirious, Moses tottered into the land of Midian…….”

    But in this last posting, you said “……Moses was……..in quite good nick when he’d crossed into the Land of Midian…….”

    All I can say is that if being “……Emaciated, parched, dirty, skin bleeding from thorns, robes in tatters, mind delirious…….” is your idea of being in “…..quite good nick……” I shudder to think what your idea of being in bad nick is.

    • Christopher says:

      In your eagerness to appear clever, you overlooked that I’d added in qualifying Moses being in good nick, that “…….He did, though, look gaunt and haggard……..”, as shorthand for “….emaciated, parched, dirty, skin bleeding from thorns, robes in tatters, mind delirious……”

      I therefore saw no contradiction in Moses appearing “……Emaciated, parched, dirty, skin bleeding from thorns, robes in tatters, mind delirious…….” with his being in “…..quite good nick…….”.

      One can be in quite good nick, without appearing to be so. You should never judge a book by its cover, you know.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s